I came here to win the pentagon and drink vodka [FM12]

And i'm all out of vodka.

Playing on FM12 because it is the best and that is the truth.

EDIT: Imgur has decided to delete loads of images from this first page of comments, will try and get them reuploaded but you may just want to skip past them as it might be a bit hard to follow otherwise


NACL - Winners with New England Revolution in 2016.

Asian Champions League - Winners with Melbourne Victory FC in 2017.

Started with the standard sunday league rep and dodgy korean and african leagues loaded to make sure it stuck. Surprisingly got offered the job at New England which was immediately accepted as it was a million times better than the other favelas on offer.


Think i started the career in SA so the MLS was halfway through when the save started. Position looks rough but on closer inspection we're not too far off the playoffs and a late run is a distinct possibility.


Squad is looking pretty threadbare, and a lack of significant pace upfront is a concern. Pacy strikers tend to tear shit up in the MLS, so ive recruited a decent brazilian scout and hopefully he can unearth a gem or two down in south america


A quick glance at the team's record shows the previous manager seemed to be intent on breaking all sorts of MLS records for winless periods. Went out the cup very early too, what's strange though is that out of the 8 quarter finalists remaining only 2 were actually MLS teams, so looks like a pretty poor cup campaign for nearly all involved.


I like the optimism.

Signed this geezer after he was highly recommended by the aforementioned scout, got experience winning tings in Europe with Partizan and the fans like the experience this brings, turns out the manager lark is rather easy after all. Also found a decent french striker rotting in the reserves, so he's been promoted to the senior squad.

Three games in, and with players still adapting to the tactics being created we've racked up 2 wins and a loss to league leading DC United. In other, more disastrous news, our star center back has managed to snap his ankle and will miss the rest of the season. What joy.

One more click of the space bar and top scorer Mansally is out for 5-6 weeks. Really need that reserve striker to step up now.

Another loss to Columbus, our first choice right back turns all Vinnie Jones and gets sent off after 20 mins, and we then lose another CB for 5 weeks. Our very thin squad is looking positively bulimic right about now. My poor substitute selection in that game also led to me employing a fairly novel and experimental 2-6-1 formation, hopefully that experiment wont be returning any time soon.

Finally, an absolutely abject season limps to its end




Those are just the fixtures post me taking over btw. I can now quite clearly see why New England were willing to hire an unemployed ex-sunday league manager, failure is not just tolerated here, but embraced. Despite my quite clear shortcomings this season, I'm just gonna blindly ignore the fact that any of this could even be my fault, and just blame the previous manager for not having the foresight to sign a striker with a finishing rating of over 10.

Waves are already being made in the transfer market, I've managed to ship out my gash GK for a 1st round draft pick and snap up a decent (if 6 years older) replacement to plug the gap. Looking forward to improving the team through the draft, thanks to our dire performance this year we should have our pick of the young whippersnappers coming out of college.

Star Performers
Me - For putting up with such a lacklustre team while they were churning out draw after draw. Next year's our year!

Chris Tierney - The only player who performed half decent, the LB has got a number of MLS teams sniffing around after him, offering me gash draft picks and players to try and tempt a trade. He'll be staying.

EDIT: Forgot to mention the non-MLS team Richmond Kickers (my feeder team) won the US Cup this season, so will be in the NACL next year. It should have been me...

*Sigh*

"The New England Revolution are now on the clock"

Heading into the draft I needed to strengthen the spine of the team, with some of the existing players and new acquisitions the flanks are looking fine but we seem to be a bit lacking down the middle, but with the 3rd and 4th overall pick that shouldnt be a problem. Say hello to the draft class of 2012


3rd overall pick, Jackson comes into the team and is immediately the best striker we have. Quality stats for finishing, bravery and acceleration and looks like hes decent from the spot too. Nice.


This guy looks like a beast. Scouts say hes the 4th best CB at the club but considering starting him from the go next season. Only problem is his god awful influence.


2nd round pick, pace gives us options off the bench. Needs to work on his composure though


3rd round guy, looks a decent backup but our RB is already pretty solid. Might try and move him on in a while for some compensation

The game gave me a rank of B for the draft, not entirely sure what that means but i'll take it. Its certainly better than the E Vancouver got \o/

New signings are here! Remember these faces, remember them when they stand on the altar, holding their recently acquired MLS winners medals high and proud above their heads...


Brought in as backup/competition for my starting GK, but to be honest theyre both as good/bad as one another so could quite quickly become first choice.


Managed to snare this guy for a supplemental draft pick. Provides decent cover at an area we were woefully short in last year


Signed this guy on an old Rosenborg save and he absolutely dominated the Norweigan league. Expecting big things


Provides cover on the left wing as well as being perfectly capable of being rotated into the squad


Another skeleton being dragged up from my past, this time from the Brazilian third tier with Santo Andre. Goes straight into the team at CM so my best RM can get back to playing there.


Cover, squad player, whatever you want to call him. Will probably get pissed hes not playing and disrupt my very carefully planned squad harmony, in which case he'll be fed to the dogs before you can say "why bother spending 3 draft picks on me then?"


My star man, my prodigal sun, the proverbial wall which I'm leaning all my hopes and dreams on. Already one of the better strikers at the club and, with 5 star potential, his only limit is the stratosphere. Real Madrid and Mourinho are already sniffing about. Watch this space.

BOOM!


BOOM!


POW!

To quote the living legend Will.I.Am himself, "I got dat power"

I hate Alan Hansen. But in the case of "Youll never win nothing with kids"-gate, I have to concede he was spot on


How does this happen? Tried to blood a few younger players (some were even making noises about wanting to leave, fools) and they play like theyve never kicked a ball before. From now on, it wont be a case of "if youre good enough youre old enough", I assure you i'll be sticking to the tried and tested "If youre too old enough, youre good enough"

Nice writing style, keep it up.

Also I remember you posting around here some time ago before disappearing?

Yeah, I had an Almeria file (which is still going) on FM11 and then another pentagon attempt I think, I actually ended up making it to Benfica and winning the CL with them but gave up with going for Africa and Asia in the end. Hope this one lasts longer!

Just over halfway in the regular season and the table looks like this





Not perfect, but not a bad position to be in. A Henry inspired New York are running away with it, but a playoff spot looks well within our reach. The only problem we have at the moment is a lack of a certified top goalscorer or go-to striker, looking around the league everyone seems to have a runaway goalscorer and ours is stuck on a measly 4. Had my eye on a decent young brazilian who then got loaned to Colorado instead, might go back in for him come Dec but we'll see. Definitely need someone who is capable of turning some of these draws into wins

EDIT: Upon closer inspection said young Brazilian is currently rotting in Colorado reserves, despite their senior squad only having about 16 members. Game's just screwing with me now

Was moaning about not getting enough game time, so managed to ship him off to Columbus for a first round draft pick


An in his place, this behemoth. Is he aged? Yes. Is he past his best? Most probably. But given the chance to sign a hero of the modern game, increasing both the position and average age of the squad in the process, you have to take it. Plus the amount of facial hair in the squad is increasing, which can only be a good thing (thats the stat players/pundits keep saying is "the only one that counts" right?)

You've one-upped yourself there, MLS Cup is yours now.





If soul patches are your thing, you know...

Just played Columbus in our next game, a 2-0 loss at home and its now awfully close for the automatic playoff spots at the top of the East. Hahnemann had an absolute stormer*

*If a stormer is playing like the 2011 David De Gea. Wearing a blindfold.

Look at it... Its majestic. If anything the audacity to blindly ignore all the naysayers only endears him to me more, its this sort of blind faith thats going help help the team forget how crappy they are.

Stay tuned for the announcement of the signings of Richard Stearman, James Harden and Tormund Giantsbane to improve the facial hair ratio to an almost unfair-to-the-rest-of-the-league level.

A pretty abysmal end to the regular season means we miss out on a bye for the first round and have to play our rivals Chicago in the wildcard, a team we haven't beat in 4 meetings. All the stars are aligned for a monumental victory on par with Istanbul 2005 (maybe not that big, but still)

I warned you/them. Not even a rapidly-becoming-a-routine collapse in the final minutes could stop us setting up a two-legged (just how I like 'em) date with Los Angeles. I also feel obliged to tell you that, in recent weeks, serious waves have been made in the transfer market. Not Marcus Hahnemann sized waves mind you, but pretty large nonetheless.

Don't know why, but my team just seem to love the playoffs. Another relatively trouble free tie against LA, although I thought my inept subs had cost it when we had to play the last 12 minutes with 10 men, but fortunately the side showed the sort of grit and resilience that was so lacking for the 34 games of the regular season (where was it in the last 5 games team huh? HUH!?)

Set up a West conference final with Dallas



In a way I'm not even disappointed, tbh I don't think we deserve a shot at the title yet, and the team still doesn't feel quite like mine, anything less than this stage next year would be a massive massive disappointment though.

Star Performers

Darius Barnes - A key factor in the team conceding less goals than last season, Barnes was present in almost every game played this season, chipping in with 4 goals too.

Petter BaelishVaagan Moen - What did I tell you? Winner of the newcomer of the year award, Petter contributed 9 assists and 4 goals from the left wing this season.

Daniel Jackson - Our first round draft pick from 1 year ago was also our top scorer with a (fairly mediocre) 12, but even that is a vast improvement on last year. Hopefully will improve on that in a more settled campaign next season. (Runner up in rookie-of-the-season too)

We had a shitty draft this year, chose to strengthen through other transfers and what was left when we got round to picking was shite anyway. Solid D grade.

In other transfers however, I believe I promised you waves...


22k!? Are they insane? The first designated player I've bought, and what a guy. Will slot straight into the team at RM, and will hopefully provide some creativity and impetus across the field from Vaagan Moen.


Aging, but looks like he could be a tank for this league.


Looks decent enough, wanted to give him tutorage under the wise old hands of Hahnemann but for some reason private chat is disabled. Also;


:'(


The man to (hopefully) solve our goalscoring issues, big Wondo scored 17 on his way to third top scorer in the MLS last year, in a pretty poor San Jose side. With our wingers hopefully he can replicate that, whilst also being a wise old head for our young guns.


Needed to strengthen CM before doing any business, so when Salt Lake offered me this guy in exchange for a winger I wasn't playing I had to bite their hand off.

Sigh. Refused to enter contract negotiations so he's off to Spain on a free. Wish him well, but never showed any kind of form that promised 5 star potential. Will be interesting to see where his career takes him though!







Not a brilliant finish, but considering our start to the season I can't complain. We hit a mini-run of form after the cup exit, and we did actually hold the 1st seed for a couple of weeks, but our trademark collapse coupled with other sides having 3 or 4 games in hand led to our slide down the table. Again, much too inconsistent to have a real grasp on the automatic playoff places.



Routine win sets up a second consecutive semi final against the Galaxy.





Gutted, but that second leg goes down as one of the greatest matches I've ever had on FM. Could've (and probably should've) won the tie, but, as usual, we kept throwing our chances away. On to next year!

Star Performers

Daniel Jackson - Another solid season from the young striker, netting 14 goals in the league (and some important ones at that) Gonna get big Wondo (who also deserves a mention btw) to tutor him next year and hopefully he can kick on even more.

Kyle Beckerman - Proved more than worth his trade, played in every single league game throughout the campaign. Scored 3 times too, but hoping he can improve on that next season.

Solid C+ in the draft, whatever.


Pretty sure this guy only fell to us at 13 because he'd broke his collar bone or something. Looks decent enough as a squad player for now, apart from the fact hes broke his foot and will miss half the season... Anyone sensing a pattern? I wont bore you with the other draft signings, they were piss poor and all got cut anyway.


Brought in as a replacement to Dybala, and (hopefully) finally an answer to my striking woes (still dont think 14 goals in a pretty poor league is good enough) Solid international record there mate, any danger of firing in the MLS? Please!?


Backup at the moment, but they way my scouts have been drooling over him he could make the step up in the near future. Only time will tell whether he'll be the next Cafu or the next Alan Hutton...


Paid big(ish) for this guy, hopefully he can be the creative presence we've lacked in the midfield, and at 19 should be able to do it for years to come.


Brought in halfway through the season as a replacement for the retiring Igor, should still be able to cut it (even at that age) for us, and if not he's only under contract for half a year so shouldnt be able to cause too much damage even if he turns out to be a lump of shite.

Halfway through the season, and we're exactly where we want to be, leading the chasing pack (some have games in hand but yknow) with one of the best defenses and offenses in the league (on paper anyway) We've apparently found a formula where we can look extremely nervy for 80 minutes, before nicking a dodgy goal late on and snatching a 1-0. Although, tbh, when i look at some of the runs I've had to endure I'll take whatever I can get.

World Cup is over (Brazil beating the Argies in the final, sounds plausible irl), and the traditional job cull has commenced. Applied for Peru and Belgium just in case, could do wonders for the old rep.

Tek it.



Not sure how it happened with my rep only being national, but who cares.





Ranked 25th in the world, expectations aren't quite as high as in real life. If we cant make the playoffs out of that group I'd be extremely disappointed, and probably deserve to lose my job...

EDIT: Since i took over, and im not sure why, Belgium's rankings have soared to a "record high" 11th. Way to heap the pressure on guys...

Great to see you're top of the league.

Good luck with Belgium. You should finish top of the group.

4th season and our first chance to win some silverware and qualify for the NACL. Our record's actually not that bad against LA, but they definitely aren't who I would've wished to face (where are the all non-MLS finals now huh!?)

In Belgium related news, beat Andorra 5-0 before losing 3-1 to Georgia in friendlies which I'm not bothered about. However, we then managed to conspire to lose 1-0 to the Czechs, who I think must have been spurred on by the appearance of an ancient Milan Baros.

Looked very bleak at 2-0 down, fell short of mustering an unlikely comeback. LA in the final was just one rung up the US Cup ladder too far I guess... Ah well, I didnt wan't to win your mickey mouse cup anyway, I have my sights set on a bigger prize... (it would be nice to win it just once though...)

So there it is! New England will be plying their trade against the elite of North American football in the NACL next year. Even though we appeared to boss the league this year, this still feels like a massive massive achievement considering where the team began. Looking forward to the adventure!



I've never seen so many green dots! Form was a lot more consistent this year, and I think we can also attribute the league success to the fact weve turned a lot of games we would have drawn last year into wins. We also appear in some games to be matched in our ability to score only in our ability to ship goals at the back, but at least its never rarely sometimes not boring...