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#339064 Transfer Rumours 2016/17
Eric Portapotty
And we'd be absolutely fucked if Higuaín doesn't adapt well to England and start banging in goals, the fans will turn against him after what he'll cost and we won't have someone to tide us over.
#338624 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
Oviedo outshooting Barca - never thought I'd see the day!
More significantly would be keeping another clean sheet, and against Barca no less.
Rayo were winless a couple games before this and their gaffer was on the brink of the sack before they notched up 2 straight wins going into this one - even then he was still in danger of being booted.
Had more shots again, but couldn't capitalise on our threats on the counter and instead we were the ones who got sucker-punched, ffs.
Derby day, and boy did we wake up for this derby.
Camilo played the role of a narrowish winger to great effect, Matuszczyk was pretty clinical (which unfortunately a rare sight these days), and we rack up our biggest win of the season.
Don't like to not keep a clean sheet, but when you're up by 5 it's hard to keep focus I suppose.
Again, looked absolutely terrifying on the break, but again we couldn't get a clinical touch on the finishing.
But we didn't lose.
Might have only scored in 1 game, but we only conceded 3 in 4 games and kept 2 clean sheets as well, which is a world of improvement on being spanked 6-0 by fucking Numancia, so there.
Besides, look where it's brought us - top half, albeit a part of one of the tightest league tables here, with only 5 points separating us from Celta in 18th.
In other news, new signing Allen Bell has managed to establish himself in our starting XI, and as a result has earned himself his international debut for the US of A.
Not the best start.
#338126 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I'm not going to try and justify this result with sound tactical explanations, my laptop's probably gone to pot and generated this result for me, who knows.
But if there's anything the that thrashing did for us it gave us confidence to fight a deficit, even if we couldn't hold the lead against Atleti.
Gave them a game all the way, even if we were under the cosh for periods.
Szeman puts his massive physique to good use with a rebound from his own header off the post, and Cristobal continued his great form deuptising for Vargas with the winner.
A comeback win, I should add - it's definitely looking up for us here.
Not the best way to end the month, but oh well we could only have so many scalps in a row.
We definitely had more than a few chances to score, but for some oorly struck efforts and a number of offsides.
We've got a decent number of tems between us and the relegation zone and we'll need it, since our next opponents are Barcelona...
#337950 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
Oh man we needed this comeback win, 3 defeats in 4 games would be reminiscent of last season's awful run of game, only at the start of the league campaign.
Cristobal also helped us on our way with dare I say the GOAT 1-touch goal:
Urghhhhhh, a good opportunity to get a second straight win and we can't keep our bloody leads.
Another goal for Camilo though, but he's been far from proving he's worth being started with his less than consistent displays.
THIS FUCKING FORMATION
I'VE BEEN IN SPAIN 4+ FUCKING SEASONS AND I STILL CAN'T DEFEND AGAINST THIS FUCKING FORMATION
FUCKING SHIT
Allen Bell made his debut in a rotated lineup, I suppose that could partially explain the loss, but who am I kidding.
Worst goal difference, no clean sheets, can't defend for shit, next up is Elche who have handed our ass to us the past few season with their wonderkid forwards, whopee.
#337865 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
Magnificent start to our season, well around the 1st half anyway, before our 2nd half put more than a few doubts into our minds.
Attack seems to be ok, but the backline... room for improvement.
Urgh ffs I never learn my lesson - shutting up shop against big sides almost never works because we don't have the quality in defence to hold them off all the way.
Man this hurt, we we on top in the 1st half and should've capitalised more on that impetus before we eventually tired and had lapses in concentration to throw away all 3 points.
If it wasn't for the fortuitous win over Rea l Sociedad we'd be accompanying Recreativo at the bottom of the table, we desperately need to improve.
Anyway, the transfer window ended as well, we've also wrapped up a transfer or two:
Another unexpected transfer from an Asian club (Matuszczyk being the 1st), he looks to be decent depth/potential, pretty low risk if I could say so myself.
And year, on the out Borodin's gone - I could never give him the game time he inevitably wanted, and with his contract running out soon I'd have been looking at losing him for nothing.
He goes back to his former club, I recoup my cash, all in all a satisfactory deal.
#337717 What Was The Last Film You Saw?
Eric Portapotty
Star gets kidnapped, with the help of other celebrities he finds the star and rescues him or something like that, something with more substance to 'oh I found you let's go back to the studio'.
I've since read that the story's much more about the chief looking for the star while juggling the many other things that he also has to handle, which is somewhat forgivable, but it doesn't justify the (imho) half arsed ending.
#337635 What Was The Last Film You Saw?
Eric Portapotty
Kingsman though, that was good.
#337511 The Night Thread Mk. IX
Eric Portapotty
#333597 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
Seems like Rayo had a great squad more that only their 34-goal striker - still slightly baffling how we ended up ahead of them.
Had bouts of poor form but was our most productive player overall, I'll be hard pressed to find a winger with his ability on his money.
Transfers:
You guys know about Szeman, Akaev and Tsvetkov, the others will be elaborated on.
Of the outs we say goodbye to Rosero (whose ability has fallen off a cliff and can no longer be considered squad-worthy) and Humberto (who never did enough to warrant a starting spot, and eventually even a place in the squad).
Tranche is relatively safe as free transfers go, he's got a decent skillset and if he doesn't work out I reckon I can move him on for a decent sum.
Straight out on loan to Almeria as well, he's already earning the club a bit of money.
Pack Chu-young signed him, not me.
But he doesn't look too shabby so the green light was given on this one.
Another free youth-ish signing, looks like he has passable technicals with room to improve so he might work out.
Little to no choice on this one, Betis had met his release clause of 5 million and when Sociedad went over that I snatched their hand off, the fools.
Hate that he's gone as he was vital to our late, late surge out of relegation - but then I think of the rest of his season and go 'meh'.
On to preseason:
Camilo (out on loan last season) made an impressive case for himself as Pascal's replacement wide left, with a couple of goals in the friendlies.
He doesn't look like he'll be good enough but hey, I'm willing to give him a shot for the next half-season, and I do need to fulfil my philosophy of developing the youths.
Overall I don't think there's much to tell from these games other than they were good for morale, they weren't too much of a challenge and weren't supposed to be anyway.
I don't believe that we'll finish that high unfortunately, there are some very good teams tipped to finish below us and then there's Rayo, with their 34-goal striker.
#333549 The Night Thread Mk. IX
Eric Portapotty
#333496 Twatball 2016
Eric Portapotty
Lots of players that will probably go all the way, probably (definitely) went for the wrong GK though.
#333479 Transfer Rumours 2015/16
Eric Portapotty
#332977 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
Desperately needed a reaction from the team, got another poor performance.
I'm scared guys.
Really, desperately needed a reaction from the team (as was the case for most of the season), ended up being on the wrong end of a hiding.
I'm really scared guys.
So now with 2 games to go we're deeper than ever in the shitter and with lieelte to no light at the end of the tunnel - I suppose it's time to prepare for my P45 eh?
Wait what? Playing an attacking game away to a midtable side, recovering from an immediate equaliser and ending up 4-1 winners?
PASCUAL SCORING A HAT TRICK?
Only reason I could come up with is Alaves no longer having anything to play for, but capitulation to this level was our forte this season, so it's surprising to benefit from it for once.
Heh, what a time to pull 2 straight wins out of our arses.
And what a time for our forwards to turn up too - Matuszczyk after such a long time out and Pascual having been rather inconsistent.
That said, he stayed true to our form to an extent by conceding and having a nervy ending to the game - at least we pulled through in the end.
Well that was a nice enough way to end the season I suppose, but it wouldn't have mattered if we were releg-
FUCK WE STAYED UP
Amazing that we weren't one of the 3 that went down, let alone having 4 teams finishing ahead of us.
(Fun fact, Rayo has an Italian striker who top scored this La Liga campaign with 34 goals. And they still finished below us.)
Heh, satisfactory - the fans should be blowing up having seen the number of times we made a mockery of ourselves out there.
Anyway, onto next season, but before that:
Akaev proved to be a serviceable option this 6 months, would need another playmaker around to deputise/compete with Alava as well.
This was a far better signing IMO, not least because he wanted upwards of 10k p/w when he was still with us.
Having gone back to Olympiakos and realising that his stock isn't that high after all he/his agent (still incredibly) agreed on a heavily discounted deal.
Notreally a great player, but he can cover no less than 5 positions and I'll be looking to train him to become the ultimate utility
beltman.#332327 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
Probably, though it looks increasingly to be by circumstance rather than choice.
--------------------------------
Fuck this team for trying to keep my hopes up by getting Alava to score a hattrick.
Not that we deserved to win the game anyway, the attack was completely disjointed and the defence, well no properly functioning defence would concede 5 goals.
In a derby too.
Decided to sit back for the 1st game of 3 extremely tough encounters, wasn't looking to work out when we conceded the opener (as usual).
Somehow Matuszczyk headed in a peach of a cross from Vargas on the break before Pascual took advantage of a defensive lapse to score the winner (very surprising as he's been extremely wasteful).
Sitting back didn't work this time, hated playing against the 4-2-3-1 and our inability to deal with it rears its ugly head yet again.
Third time of 3, and another loss.
At least we can say that we didn't deserve anything out of this game anyway, 1 shot on goal and all.
Still knee deep in the shitter, but next up is Celta, if we can get a win there then there's all to play for.
Though we did lose to them earlier in the season...
#332192 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
We shouldn't have won this, let alone keep a clean sheet - but that we did.
We had to endure a barrage of attacks from the off, but eventually we got our footing in the game, and got into a shock 2-goal lead before the interval.
Sociedad came back into the 2nd half looking to recover a goal or two, but we managed to hold the win for once.
And we fall right back to Earth.
Probably went with the wrong formation, their 4-2-3-1 wide was always going to stretch our back 3 all the way, and they did.
Still I didn't explain how we capitulated the way we did, then again our whole season has been full of capitulations so this is just par for the course.
Back to the drawing board for the defence, and we coped well for the most part.
The attack though, not so much - Matuszczyk has been terrible lately and this was no different, going offside on great chances, not doing well in front of goal and all etc..
Nikolaou's equaliser had more than a hint of offisde, ironically.
FUCK we needed to win this, it's like the Newcastle draw with Villa - if we couldn't even beat Getafe we deserve to go down, and we probably will as it turned out.
It was basically the Athletic game - solid enough defence, awful attack.
Well this time we didn't even have a flukey goal to show for our efforts.
I'll put this very simply: our next 4 games are Gijon (the Asturian Derby), Barca, Real Madrid and (albeit a slightly underperforming) Valencia.
I don't think we'll survive the season, and I doubt I'll survive this stretch.
Something else to distract me from this shitshow:
I guess it's good that Sanchez has potential, given how Borodin has handed in a transfer request in another one of my disastrous transfer deals.
#332074 2015/16 Champions League
Eric Portapotty
#332022 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
Over the last few games I was told of our poor setpiece defending, so obviously we worked on them.
Where in their 1st 3 goals come from? Set fucking pieces.
At least we found a bit of fight after the break (and could've won if Pascual didn't snatch his chance from Nikolaou FROM AN OFFSIDE POSITION) we could've even gotten the draw.
After the game Holtz was transfer-listed, can't stand his shite at the back anymore, and at this rate I'm all but ready to admit my failings at his signing.
Got rid of Holtz, still conceded 3 , but at least we didn't lose - baby steps I guess.
OOHH!@!! Best performance of the season by far - virtually everything clicked into place from the get-go, never looked like losing this (though we did looking like conceding).
Nikolaou has hit some incredible vein of form as well, somehow bagging 7 in 3 - mightily relieved I didn't send him out on loan now.
.... And we're brought back down to Earth.
Don't let Pascual's goal fool you - it was a mishit cross, and throughout the game he was snatching at others' chances, failing to keep himself onside and missing the target repeatedly.
I wouldn't have him as the root cause of our loss, but he certainly could have won it for us.
So we're still waist deep in the shitter, and with only 4 other teams realistically in the relegation dogfight this could turn ugly for us.
We've also got a pre-contract signing on the way:
If we go down his existence could be a huge bane, but I had to get him such was the state of or backline.
His main strength is well, his strength and his physicality in general, which can hopefully make up for his rather average defensive ability.
#332011 The Armoury
Eric Portapotty
#331988 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
To be honest I was just looking to play on until I got sacked, such was my form:
Worst form in the league, horrible excuse for a defence, no hope whatsoever.
At least we had the King's Cup to look forward to:
NOPE, that utterly useless backline doing me no favours still.
After the 2nd leg Gabriele Centanni (the loanee centre/right back) was relieved of his duties - didn't have the height to play CB< didn't have the proper speed to play RB, didn't have the mentality to play in defence at all - probably up there with my worst signings.
Fortunately we seem to heve seen some light at the end of the tunnel, albeit against fellow strugglers Hercules.
Too bad we weren't able to end this wretched run with another victory, again the backs to the wall thing fails to work.
So we're now right smack in the shitter, but with Matuszczyk looking to return soon he could be the catalyst for our resurgence.
Transfers (it is the January window after all):
In
Outs
Akaev is an excellent distributor of the ball and has some eye for a pass, will share the creative load with Alava.
Geirsson comes in for the absolutely hapless Centanni, and seems to already perform better than the latter - better in the air, better passing ability, should've gone for him in the 1st place.
Marquez and Abreu are from celler-dwellers Getafe, makes for poor reading with regards to our transfer ambitions.
Marquez is just around to sit on the bench and provide cover on the left flank, while Abreu is Bosganas' replacement as backup LB.
#331130 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
A vital derby win, gives us hope that we can still thrive in a Matuszczyk-less setup.
That Horiuchi dude was just too good for us, we tried to get at them but he swept us away on the wing, getting to the centre and scoring a couple of scorchers.
And the 2nd of both Spanish giants, back to back.
I'd have loved for us to hold on to our lead but Real's attack was just too much for our (admittedly) under-equipped backline.
back into the lower half we go, but with still 5 points above the relegation zone there's still a bit of breathing space for us.
Things can go very wrong very quickly though...
#331092 2014/15 Fantasy Football
Eric Portapotty
Susie EURO 2016: 24377RB5
#331079 The Armoury
Eric Portapotty
hype
#331014 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
There wasn't any terrible finishing or poor performance (apart from conceding a penalty) - we were quite simply up against a goalkeeper on his day.
Great comeback win, but it was business as usual initially (unfortunately) - cite back, concede, then decide to go attack and find a couple of goals along the way.
We haven't got any sort of positive game plan going, too dependant on moments of magic from Matuszczyk, Varges et al..
A win, a fortuitous one, and eventually a Phyrric one:
FUCK
Worst news possible, the team was built around him and I've got no ready-made replacement.
Elche are nuts in this save, got a great youth system going with both scorers here being youth products and great players in their own right.
Nikolaou did his part up front deputising for Matuszczyk, but his game looks to be too limited to replicate the latter's all-round game.
Unfortunately there's been another casualty:
He'd just come on as a sub and we end the game with 2 torn calf muscles in the team
Top half, minor miracle if you ask me, but it's all downhill from here now that we're down 2 strikers (and one Matuszczyk in particular).
#331000 2014/15 Fantasy Football
Eric Portapotty
Highest among the regulars in the site (that I could recognise) was TS who came in 101st, 134th for me
Anyway, EURO2016's fantasy football game is up and running: http://eurofantasy.uefa.com/en/fantasy16/
#330156 The Night Thread Mk. IX
Eric Portapotty
#330094 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
Those 4 games really were a downer tbh, was pretty much present-day Watford atmosphere around in that time.
Thanks as well for reading! Glad to have you around
Oh and for real Matuszczyk is the GOAT.
Oh look I must be still playing a game from last se- NOPE IT'S JUST CONCEDING A GOAL IN THE 1ST MINUTE TO NEWLY PROMOTED HERCULES IN OUR SEASON OPENER.
Some things never change.
In fairness it was always going to be hard to contain Atleti's attack, but it's still gutting to lose a lead in any case.
Anyway, we quickly wrapped up a deal before the end of the transfer window:
Found Curri when looking through Albania's NT page (which Shala is also a part of). He's an upgrade over Bermudez is almost every aspect (barring Determination but that's probably irrelevant if the goalkeeping isn't good enough).
But spare a thought for Bermudez, who has been ousted from his starting GK spot by Albanians for 2 straight years - you don't see that everyday.
New GK, same problems.
Our backline has been truly terrible - Centanni (despite being supposedly 'our best player'
Though it has to be said that Matuszczyk had a poor game as well, and it was left to Nikolaou to score on his debut off the bench.
URGH, finally getting a win on the board.
Matuszczyk looks like at the end of the day he's still running the attack, scoring the winner and providing the assist for the opener.
WHOOP, 2 straight wins and our points doubled with another great Matuszczyk performance.
And we seem to have figured out our defence, well we still need a clean sheet to actually prove that, but it's progress.
Spoke too soon - man Holtz is really hopeless.
Also another off day from Matuszczyk, but it's only fair that he has one with all his carrying of this team on his back.
See? What the fuck did I tell you.
Centanni was brought back from exile to deputised for the newly exiled Holtz, and promptly made another mistake for their equaliser.
But nothing could overshadow the brilliance of Matuszczyk here, with his assist and 2 goals grabbing us the vital win.
9 points from 7 games, what could have been if we actually had a competent backline.
But at least we aren't Getafe.
Also randomly took charge of the Indonesian U23s for the Asian Games:
That turned out as good as it could get, maximum points despite nearly tripping out on multiple occasions.
Dammit, real annoying to get pegged back after establishing a steady lead, but arguably all that matters is our cross to the next round - albeit on nervy penalties.
#330093 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
#329344 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
Absolutely well deserved - tied for 5th top scorer in his 1st season in the Spanish top flight of all places.
Signing of the season as well - 700k for 20 La Liga goals coupled with another 400k to get us promoted, it's been a great couple of seasons with him in the side.
Horst Holtz much less so - highlights were few and far between and he more often than not contributed to our horrendous defensive lapses.
Transfers:
The 3 Bosman arrivals, after which deals of varying levels of sense.
Ali Diallo looks set to become one of the league's best defenders if the reports are anything to go by.
Priority would be to train him to play RB, can't let that crossing go to waste.
Centanni will be the starting RB while Diallo learns the ropes. a good character who I wouldn't mind signing if he impresses here.
Its helps his case that he's rated as our best current player the moment he stepped foot at Oviedo - not so good news for the club though.
Tsvetkov is a cheap, dirt cheap utility man, providing cover for multiple positions and being something of an all rounders in ability.
Ivan Sergio was an expensive error of judgement that Park Chu-young proposed and I (unfortunately) rubberstamped.
Of the outs of any significance was fans Player of our promotion Season Rivero, still a good LW on his day but it's time to move him on.
Preseason:
Really not the best, our opener featured a dire 1st half performance where we contrived to go into the break trailing; thankfully we improved to add respectability to the scoreline.
Then we lost to River Plate - apparently we were underdogs, but that's not to say the loss was acceptable by any means.
2 consecutive 1-0 wins before another shambolic defensive performance to finish the series - we could be in for a bumpy start to the season.
Speaking of which, we're projected to finish a place lower than last season.
Which is depressing, though I've got a suspicion we'll do worse and go down this time round, not least due to the haphazard preparation for the season.
#328992 The Night Thread Mk. IX
Eric Portapotty
#328242 [FM14] Pentagon - Redux
Eric Portapotty
I'm not going to glorify the end of this season by going into detail, just weep for my collapse.
Matuszczyk was injured for the entirety of this period, and obviously we missed him sorely, if the 1 goals in 4 games hasn't been enough of a hint.
The midtable was quite tight this year, those 4 straight losses really killed our chances of finishing in the top half.
Players of the Season:
Matuszczyk was far and away our most important player this season, scored a shit ton of important goals to prop the team into the top half and keep us there.
Sure he's got his droughts but I wouldn't have wanted anyone else leading the line this season - let's hope it rings true for the next campaign.
Right winger Marcos Vargas was a mainstay on the right wing, albeit due more to our lack of options there.
Went through a wretched patch where he didn't have any end product really, but he did produce some insane moments, like the double against Atleti when we were a goal down and were being dominated.
Club captain Fernando Alava also did his bit, with double figures in goals+ assists.
Though this season didn't really work out for him, having to vacate the AMC spot for the Batuhan Duman experiment, and playing a deeper role.
Thing is despite his output he's not been able to influence a game as a playmaker should, will need to work on the tactics to get the best out of him - any suggestions?
-----------------
A surprisingly accurate summary there; obviously didn't expect us to stay up as easily and early as we did, but by jove were our performances dire.
There'd be at least 1 defensive fuckup once every 2 games, we conceded a lot of early goals, mistakes all over - not a pretty sight.
This makes me feel like I'd rather we made a loss.
In other news:
No idea why but being in an Egyptian club for nearly 20 years and choking at crunch time in continental competition seems to have elevated me to legend territory - the bookies also had me as odds-on to take over at Juve and Real Madrid.
In any case, another season here to see if I can get this club any higher.
Oh look, the stadium I requested was finally finished.
... And they named it after Mohamed Adel, makes sense since he's a legend over there while I'm only an icon...