Newcastle Thread

I'm not convinced we're negative. I just think we're fucking terrible away (and at home).

We're more negative away from home than at home, but we're playing very badly, and it all comes back to the spectacularly shit call to appoint a self-delusional moron that we should've seen as damaged goods when he destroyed Derby's promotional hopes last season.

Negative maybe the wrong word but we don't look to play at our pace and we don't look to control games away from home the way we do at St James's.

Which is fair enough against the likes of Man City but it's not really excusable at places like Everton, Palace and West Brom where if we showed more going forward we could have easily gotten something.

I don't know, I reckon it's the other way round. Players who half try at home, don't try away. Newcastle can't string two passes together, leading to the defence being under the kosh for 90 minutes, and an inability to get out of our half.

There is nothing wrong with being negative imo, But you shouldn't be comprehensively outplayed and outclassed by Tony Pulis' West Bromwich Albion side even if you have 11 guys lined up on your own 6 yard box for 90 minutes.

Nothing wrong with being negative at all tbf - just theres a lot wrong with being fucking useless as you say.

Genuinely only think Janmaat, Colback, Dummett, Taylor and Tiote try their best every single time they play. And 4 of those 5 aren't really good enough for anything more than perenial strugglers/Championship teams.

Yep. Jack Colback what a guy!

Not saying he's good. Similar way Dummett is also championship quality.

Both give their all though

It's looking ever more likely that Benitez is on his way in.
I'm kind of happy with that but still scared for the next 10 games. Does he have a relegation scrap in him?

Is it a bit negative to think our best hope of a clean sheet on Sunday is Defoe getting injured in training?

Think you'd stand a better chance if Steven Taylor got injured tbf.

If Mbemba and/or Coloccini were fit, then yes, but our only back-up options are untried at a senior level. Hell of a scenario to throw them in to.

This.

Even if it would result in John Carver playing centre back.

I'm bewildered at the fact that Newcastle churns out consistently shite centre halves. I can't think another team who has had such little quality in that area constantly for the last decade or so

Amazing isn't it?

Spent about 500 billion over the past 2 years and only bought 1 as well.

So, Elliot was stretchered off during an Ireland friendly and is likely to be out for the rest of the season.

Which leaves Darlow (shaky in his only appearance) or Woodman (18 yo)... I'm getting a feeling we're not going to survive this blow.

Only team in the world to consistently have 2 of their first choice goalkeepers injured all the time

To be fair both Krul injuries were international duty related (last season's was the fault of a fucking friendly as well). But its a colossal pain in the arse regardless.

A number of Notts Forest fans on Twitter incidentally seem to think we're screwed and will be turning up there in a few months if we're relying on Darlow. Yippee.

It appears Daryl Janmaat left St. Mary's with his arm in a sling after breaking two fingers by punching the dressing room wall. Would've summed up our shitty season more if he'd missed and managed to hit himself in the face tbf.

Meanwhile, Wijnaldum has come out and said he thinks certain players don't try hard enough. Though he lacked the self-awareness to add himself to that list.

If only we had someone with the effort... hard to believe Ben Arfa has 18 goals in Ligue 1 less than 2 years after Pardew sold him to make way for Remy Cabella.

It's not factually true but why not?

Siem de Jong has joined in with criticising his teammates.

If open criticism from manager, players and what feels like the entire media doesn't provoke a reaction from certain players against Swansea, then frankly nothing will.

Which aspect?

Pardew left before Ben Arfa.

Who let's not forget helped Newcastle stay up last year - by helping relegate Hull. I don't get how anyone can want Ben Arfa back - I'm sick of watching cunts who clearly don't want to be here. I love Ben Arfa but I much prefer him to our current cunts - but anyone too hungover to play football can fuck right off.

I'm sure Benitez will make the toughest choice of them all. An unchanged team. The Rafa special.

Half-right - HBA was out of contract that summer anyway, so whether or not he completed that Hull loan, he still would've left.

Maybe its easy to over-romanticise Ben Arfa, and all the frustrations that come with the injuries, arguments and hasty exit, but he looked more often like he wanted to play than some of the other feckless cretins currently wearing black and white tops.

Meanwhile, Steven Taylor is apparently going to be banished following his appalling display at Southampton and contract allowed to expire. Always tempting to think what might've been, but he often appears in our lowest ebbs.

Jonas Gutierrez has won his case. Good for him.



Meanwhile apparently Sports Direct are going to start paying for advertising - Cue people genuinely complaining about this

Glad Jonas won his case.

Quite outrageous that they haven't been for so long tbf. Good move though

Interesting that the jury has rejected parts of Pardew, Charnley and Carver's evidence as lacking credibility. Charnley reluctant to acknowledge Gutierrez played in the World Cup and that he was a regular for the Argentina team before his diagnosis is particularly groan inducing.

I think it is interesting the Sports Direct thing may well kick in if we get demoted, and thus help us slightly cheat FFP regulations in the Championship. Not that I'm going to dispute that its way overdue regardless of tier.

Christ alive the statement made by Newcastle United on this is a fucking joke.

Its just dawned on me how much we need favours from Watford and Everton, given they both play Sunderland & Norwich in their last 2 games. So if they roll over to both, we're fucked. And that's even before dodging Pardew (eep), an attempt by Villa to drag us with them (er...), and Spurs maybe needing a win for the title.

I think we need 9/9 points ideally, though, and even that may well not be enough. Either that or I'm over-complicating things.

Just try and win our games. - We can't influence Norwich or Sunderland. If we go down it will be deserved and stemming from being shite for 8 months.

Nine points might not be enough - 2 points might be.

Spurs thankfully should be out of the title race and Kane/Chadli/Dembele/Alli/Eriksen/Dier/Alderweireld/Vertonghen/Rose/Walker/Lloris will hopefully have one eye on the Euros.

A possible injury to Dier and ban for Alli means they might be 2 less problems, and with any luck they may have a Euro-related rest. Not that it'd help if Chadli plays, given he usually scores v NUFC.

And yeah, I guess ultimately, Newcastle have to win as many points as possible and if its not enough then its our own fucking fault for being down there. We'll see really. But I guess it only really hit me yesterday that the other two rivals for the drop have to face the same opponents, which I didn't really know until the reinforcement of this fact by all the "Here's the remaining games" stuff.

If we only get 2 points and that keeps us up, then that's a fair contender for shittest end to the season ever from a neutral POV. Not that I'd care, ofc.