The Night Thread Mk. IX

Someone should steal his bike.

I'm going to respectfully disagree with that. If you call me out on something and provide me with evidence suggesting otherwise, I'll accept that I'm wrong. I might get pissy from time to time but on the whole I like to think I can engage in a reasoned debate.

Call me what you want but please don't throw me in with the Liverpool fans.

Oh good. Handbags.
If you want to know why people don't post here as much, it's because this stuff doesn't happen anymore. Keep it coming please.

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University .

On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.

The elephant turned to face the man and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same fucking elephant.

This is for everyone who sends me those heart-warming bullshit stories.

>Swedish guy
>9gag
sounds about right

>Swedish guy
>9gag
sounds about right

Anyway, I fucking hate working in retail. My arsehole of a supervisor was supposed to replace all the expired promotion POS and labels with the new ones, except he couldn't be arsed. So customers have been coming up, expecting to get the promotional price, but then get angry at me when it stays at original price.

You whine a lot about your job. Makes me think that you are almost most certainly the problem. Man up.

Its alright I couldn't even get hard the other night. Playing pool with a rope is only fun for about 3 seconds.

Why am I posting this? I'm not quite sure.

I hope this is real.

You're not a real man until you've thumbed in a softie.